Extremist Ideology

How desperation, scarcity, and lack of exposure elevate a woman’s perceived value

“She’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

“No one can compare to her.”

“I’ll never find someone as good as her.”

If you’re a man, you’ve likely had similar thoughts about certain women throughout your life— I certainly have.

The other day, I was reminiscing with my friends about how we would obsesses over women in our teens and early twenties. If you started talking to a cute girl—or had a situationship with someone hotter than you had previously been able to attract—she subsequently became the primary focus of your life.

I think younger guys are so dramatic with women because their primary source of knowledge about relationships prior to gaining any actual experience are movies. It’s entertainment—of course relationships are going to be portrayed in a hyper-exaggerated, over-romanticized fashion. Drama sells.

She’s his motivation for everything.

She’s the one who got away.

Hollywood: You will sacrifice yourself for a mid

Being older and having dating experience under your belt has its advantages. It tethers you to reality. You realize there are hundreds of millions of cute women out there with interesting aspects to their personalities.

Most learn that relationships are transitory, and most people you encounter will exit your life at some point. The cute girl who flirted with you at the kegger isn’t your destiny—she wasn’t laughing with you so you’d save her from her boring boyfriend. She was buzzed and wanted attention.

As you mature as a man, you’ll (hopefully) stop looking at women through such a romanticized lens.

This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t adore the woman you’re with, or strive to date women who are some of the most attractive you’ve seen.

Alternative reality: “I love the Smiths!” “That’s nice—please fuck off.”

There are women you will find to be special in this world—that’s to be encouraged. But even if you meet that person, don’t allow yourself to view them in an extreme, hyper-exaggerated manner, where she is the apex of desirability.

I assure you, she’s not.

She’s a flawed, imperfect human. And she doesn’t want to be put on a weird, unrealistic pedestal. Your obsession with her looks is tied to novelty, and fades over time. Men with substantial dating experience know this.

Despite what you see on Tik Tok, women DO NOT want to be with men who are obsessed with them— it’s unnatural, desperate, and weird. They want to be with a guy who appreciates them, but also treats them normally, and sometimes feels like he can do better.

A woman is far more likely to want to date a guy who thinks she’s mid on occasion than a guy who is weirdly obsessed with her and believes he can’t do better. Would you want to date someone like that? Fuck no.

If you find yourself think in these extreme terms with a woman you’re dating, just met, or an ex, you need exposure therapy, and lots of it.

When you’re starving, you‘ll eat dog food.

When you’re dying of thirst, you’ll drink piss.

If you are broke, $25 seems like a fortune.

The same concept applies to dating. Embrace the idea of achieving abundance in your dating life; explore all avenues— online, Cold Approach, nightgame, social circle, activities, etc.

The more you view dating as a skill, and more importantly, learn to DATE THE WOMEN you actually want to date, the less likely you will be to view women in extreme, desperate terms.